About two hours ago, it's 4:05pm, my great grandma passed away. It's a little surreal.
I knew a woman in housecoat, that smelled like soft, ivory soap, and spoken in a sweet tone, with a wonderful high laugh that sounded like a song. She fed me cookies, and candy and that famous red-cinnamon applesauce. She told me stories about her "good ole days". She had a house full of framed photographs of her family, and good things to say about every one of us. She loved the Lord.
I took Lydia to see her after she was born and on her 90th birthday we attended and Rooster met her as well. I have a photo I took of her that day, where she looks so radiant. Where she feels loved and is beaming love, and that is how I see her. That's what I saw when I closed my eyes today and thought of her.
I love her deeply and I am so glad that she is finally free. Free from her own faults and the swarms of hurt around her. Free from pain and sorrow. In heaven, dancing and singing and laughing that song like giggle.
There are generations of us now, My Dad, his Mother, his brothers and sisters, My cousins, My children and My cousins children... all with baggage, all handling our own lives differently.
We're all out here, trying to make sense of things, missing her and trying to make our own peace.
I love you Great Gran, I'll see you soon and maybe we can swap a few stories over a bowl of red-cinnamon applesauce...